Michael Jackson is my earliest memory. I hand wrote him letters at age 5 telling him I wanted to marry him and be his dance partner, and then mercilessly followed my mom around the house until she agreed to put them in envelopes and mail them. I stood on our porch and stoically waited for her to put them in the mailbox like some sort of postal sergeant. When she finally relented, it later smartly occurred to me that the letters had no postage on them. Im sure my mother about lost her mind when I announced that she was indeed defrauding me and thus heartlessly preventing me from expressing my appreciation for my one true love. We did not have the internet in the early 80's, and MJ's fanclub address, Im sure, was not in the phone book.
For my next birthday, my Grandmother bought me a purple Michael Jackson T-Shirt to commemorate my new obsession. I dont think I had ever been that excited about anything in my short life. It had his face on the front, with a typical 80's silver design all over it. It was so beautiful and I wanted to wear it every day. I lived on a street with about 10 teenage boys, who, when seeing my new shirt, predictably teased me about my new "boyfriend." I threw rocks at them for their blatant disrespect of Michael and conceded that they were jealous their grandmother's did not give them a beautiful purple shirt too. At night before bed, I asked my mom to pray for them that they would apologize to Michael and that Jesus would give them cool shirts too. Im surprised my mother never took to drinking.
Thriller came out and I wasn't aloud to see it. Ironically Michael's statement of denial of any involvement in all things satanic, which helpfully preceded the video, meant to assuage parents, is exactly what tipped off my mom in the first place. As soon as the word "occult" appeared on screen, off went the TV! I think she took it as a foreboding of possible images that would demonically possess her children, although she vehemently denies it. She was foiled again when Dad came home and flipped on MTV. I snuck behind the couch in my usual form and watched the full length video. However, the joke was on me cuz it scared me so bad that I had to snuggle in bed with my sister - in a crib! Try explaining why you snuck into the baby's room and slept in a crib with a 2 year old! Thriller did have some positive lasting effects on me though, birthing my secret dream of becoming a back-up dancer after watching that incredible zombie dance break down. To this day Im terrified of eye contacts, and I trace it back to first seeing them on Michael, and hating it. I refuse to wear them now, even though I probably need them. Influence!
Christmas of 1987 brought my family our very first CD player. It was a HUGE event. The very first CD we unwrapped on Christmas morning was MJ's BAD. I was hooked. I spent countless hours in my backyard dancing to his music, watching MTV and trying to learn his choreography. Moonwalker, the movie, came out shortly after and I dont remember watching much else until I discovered the Disney Channel and the Mickey Mouse Club. The extended version of Smooth Criminal is still one of his best works to date. There is a music break in the middle where he merely adlibs, and its so pure and brilliant. Its spaces like these where we define genius.
Im writing this today because Ive been reminiscing since last night and felt compelled to pay some sort of tribute - to him, and to my childhood. What he gave to all of us cannot be relegated to a simple summation, he spun the thread that wove itself into the fabric of our lives. It connected all of us, from completely opposite walks of life, into this same collective experience. Its a beautiful and simple truth.
Michael was the soundtrack to LIFE.
All the videos played in rotation today each remind me where I was, and who I was, when I first saw them, sang them, felt them. Those times were happy and bursting with possibility. We are so beyond fortunate to have had an artist in our time that wrote the blueprints that inspired a generation. This moment - This is our Elvis. This is our Lennon. It is an incredible deep wound. Glittered socks and black loafers that will never be filled.
Celebrities die, and its tragic and sad. This to me was a punch to the gut. It was personal. I mourn for him today, and for the tortured and flawed person who later evolved, and for his family and children.
We should be dancing in the streets, opening the hydrants, and celebrating this man for what he gave us. He built the stage, he drew the smiles, he sang the notes. We owe him.
Thank you Michael.
Im posting my all-time favorite Michael Jackson Memory. The epic 3-D extravaganza that was the film Captain EO at Disneyland is one of my favorite things ever! Thanks to You Tube, we all can relive it!
Rest in Peace.
1 comment:
We've obviously discussed his death at length already, but thank you for this. It's amazing how much one person brought to the WORLD, without the majority of us ever knowing him.
My own random MJ story: I taught myself the dances from Beat It and Thriller. TO THIS DAY, whenever I hear either one, I will do the dances. Doesn't matter where I am - in the car, in the grocery store, IN A CLUB IN LAS VEGAS - you can count on me busting them out. Just ask Studio 54 at the MGM. I've been known to push people out of the way to give me space.
Post a Comment